Paul was a spiritual father to the Corinthians, and as such had certain responsibilities toward them. In this message, learn our duties toward those we are a spiritual father or mother to.
Teaching Notes:
The Responsibility of a Spiritual Father
1 Corinthians 4:14-21
Intro: In this letter, Paul has referred to himself as a farmer, builder, galley slave, and steward. In this section he changes metaphors again, and refers to himself as a spiritual father. There is a reason for this change in metaphors. Paul knows that there is a group of people in Corinth that are arrogant, proud, and divisive, and that he needs to take them head on in order to quench any further problems. In order to resolve further problems, Paul uses his trump card. He tells them that he is their spiritual father in the faith, and as such will exercise his spiritual authority.
Notice 4:15. The countless tutors mentioned here would be all the various spiritual teachers that ministered among them, including Apollos and Cephas. Paul is reminding them that his relationship to them was unique. He was the one who first preached the gospel to them so that they were converted. In 4:14 he refers to them as his “beloved children.” Just as an earthly father’s heart goes out to his children with human love, so Paul’s heart naturally went out to these Corinthians with God’s love.
In this section we get a good glimpse of how Paul viewed his responsibility as a spiritual father to his children. We will see that he had a 4-fold responsibility toward them. He was responsible to warn them, exhort them, set an example for them, and discipline them.
1. A Spiritual Father Warns His Children: 4:14
I do not write these things to shame you: Paul has been pretty rough on the Corinthians in this chapter. He has resorted to using biting sarcasm to show them their proud and haughty spirit that they might repent (4:8-10). However, his real point in this was not because he viewed them as his enemies and wanted to shame them, but because he viewed them as his children and wanted to warn them. He was not prompted by bitterness to write as he had, but by love.
But to admonish you: The word admonish means “to warn.” Paul needed to warn them that their pride and arrogance was only going to hurt them and the church. If not checked, it would result in schisms in the body of Christ.
When a family moves from the country into a big city, it is the father’s duty to set his children down and give them a stern warning about the dangers they will face in their new environment. They can’t just run into the street to retrieve their ball, or accept candy or rides from strangers. They must be careful about these dangers. The father is not warning them because he is angry with his children. He warns them because he loves them and doesn’t want them to be hurt. Likewise, if you are a spiritual father or mother to someone, you need to warn them of the dangers that they may not see. Just recently we visited a dear friend in Tennessee. He has recently began to read the Scriptures and seek the Lord. When I asked him if he were to die and stand before God, why should He allow him into heaven, he replied, “Because I love You, and tried my best to do what you wanted.” This reply made me nervous, in that I wondered if perhaps he had not truly understood the gospel of grace, and thought that his acceptance by God was conditioned by his works. I warned him never to trust in his own righteousness, and we read the parable of the Pharisee and the Tax Collector together and discussed it. I remember a time when Debbie had to warn my sister not to date a non-Christian, and how tense their relationship became. There was another time when three of us met with a brother who had fallen into adultery, and warned him to have nothing to do with her any more, including casual visits or phone calls. Now, what do you think prompted these warnings? Hatred or bitterness? No! Love for their souls, and a desire that they would prosper spiritually. If you are a spiritual father or mother you must be willing to do the hard thing at times, and firmly warn the disciple of the spiritual dangers he is exposing himself to.
2. A Spiritual Father Exhorts His Children: 4:16
Therefore I exhort you: The word exhort means “to urge to a course of action.” That which Paul was urging them to do was to follow his example. The Bible teaches us that we should exhort one another day after day so that none are hardened by the deceitfulness of sin (Heb.3:13). In fact, we are also taught that when we meet together as a church it is for the purpose of exhorting one another (Heb.10:25). Not only is teaching the Word essential for a healthy church, but mutual exhortation is no less important.
A father exhorts his child in many ways. He may exhort his son to keep his room clean, use his manners with guests, or be respectful toward adults. Likewise we need to exhort our spiritual children in things like trusting God, repenting of sin, obeying the Word, using their spiritual gifts, serving others, forgiving those that have wronged them, persevering in trials, praying without ceasing, studying the Word, sharing their faith, and giving to the poor. We need to know others well enough that our exhortations flow naturally from a heart of love for their spiritual welfare and progress.
3. A Spiritual Father Sets An Example For His Children: 4:16-17.
Be imitators of me: In context, this must refer back to Paul’s description of himself and his ministry in 4:8-13. Imitate me in being willing to be a fool for Christ, to be weak and without honor in the eyes of the world, to be hungry, poorly clothed, homeless, roughly treated for the sake of the kingdom. Imitate us in toiling, working with our hands, blessing when we are reviled, enduring when we are persecuted, conciliating when we are slandered. In other words, imitate us in being willing to lose your lives for Christ’s sake, dying to a life of ease and comfort for the sake of the gospel, and responding in a Christlike way to your enemies.
For this reason I have sent to you Timothy… he will remind you of my ways which are in Christ: Paul loved these Corinthians so much that he was not content just sending off this letter. He wanted them to have a flesh and blood person who would help them in their Christian lives. Paul was not able to come to them himself right at the moment, so he did the next best thing. He sent them the one person whom he knew would be genuinely concerned for their welfare (Phil.2:20). And what was Timothy’s job among them? To remind them of Paul’s ways. Interestingly, Timothy was not to remind them of Paul’s doctrine, but his ways. Theirs was a behavioral problem. They needed to be reminded of how Paul lived among them. They needed to be reminded that the believer must take up his cross and follow Jesus. He must die to himself so that he can live to Christ. He must repent of all sin and mortify the deeds of the flesh. He must humble himself under the mighty hand of God. He must be willing to make sacrifices for the sake of the kingdom. The Corinthians had forgotten these truths and instead viewed themselves as already filled, already rich, and having become kings (4:8).
A human father knows that he must set a good example for his children, because if his example contradicts his words, his children are far more likely to follow his bad example than his good teaching. Thus, a father will seek to set an example for his children by being a hard worker, being faithful to his wife, being humble and respectful toward others. He will also seek to set a good example by not abusing drugs or alcohol, not smoking, not using profanity, not stealing, lying or cheating.
How about you? Are you setting a good example for your spiritual children? Would you be pleased if your spiritual children live their Christian lives just like you? Would you want them to imitate you in your zeal for Christ, your service to others, your love for the saints, your diligence in the Scriptures? Oh, these are sobering thoughts. Let’s take them to heart this morning!
4. A Spiritual Father Disciplines His Children: 4:18-21
Shall I come to you with a rod or with love and a spirit of gentleness? There was a group of proud, arrogant, divisive believers in Corinth. They thought they were safe because Paul was gone, and for all they knew, would never return. Paul wants them to know they are greatly mistaken! He is coming to them soon, if the Lord wills, and when he does he will find out if there is any divine power behind all their words. They are puffed up and have a lot to say, but what are their lives like? Does God confirm their words by granting attesting signs, like He did for the apostles? When they preach the word, does God attend it by saving lost sinners, as He did for the apostles? Or, are they just a lot of hot air? Paul basically gives them the option of how he would act towards them when he comes. If they follow his counsel in this letter and heed Timothy’s ministry among them, he could come to them with love and gentleness. But if they would not repent of their arrogance and division, he would have to come with a rod. He would not hesitate to rebuke, or administer church discipline if necessary.
All of us who are fathers or mothers know that there are many times when we must go further than just warning, exhorting, or setting a good example. These are all using the shepherd’s staff. But, If all else fails, we must discipline our children – we must use the shepherd’s rod. We must do whatever is necessary to change their course and help them amend their ways. Sometimes this takes the form of a spanking, putting them on restriction, or denying them certain privileges.
When all else fails with our spiritual children, we must be willing to bring church discipline to bear on their lives, that they might not be lost to sin. Jesus spelled out the steps to this discipline in Mt.18:15-17. This is extremely difficult and emotionally draining, but if we care for this person’s soul, we will be willing to follow Christ’s teaching on it. There have only been a handful of times when we have had to exercise church discipline. I don’t enjoy it, and would rather avoid it, but there does come a time, when it is necessary. We need to make up our minds that we love our spiritual children more than we love our own comfort.
Application:
Take a minute, and think of your “spiritual children”. Are you admonishing them, exhorting them, setting a good example for them, and if necessary, joining the rest of the church in disciplining them? May God help us to learn from Paul’s example and be faithful to our “children” for Christ’s sake!
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