Love for other believers is the greatest mark of Christian maturity, and is absolutely essential if any church is to be healthy. In this message Pastor Brian discusses why we are to love, who we are to love, how we are to love, and what will happen when we love.
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Loving One Another
John 13:34-35
In our first message in this series “A Passion For The Church” we saw that Jesus Christ has a passion for His church. He has had this passion from eternity past. The church is who Christ has loved, given Himself for, sanctifies, glorifies, nourishes, cherishes, and unites Himself to forever. If Christ is passionate for the church, we ought to be as well. We should love what He loves. If His love is set upon the church, brothers and sisters, our love should be set upon the church.
In our second message, I sought to show you why every genuine Christian should make a covenant commitment to a local church. This commitment keeps us from bailing when things aren’t going well, or our needs aren’t being met they way we want. I gave four reasons to join a church: to obey the one another commands, to obey and submit to your leaders, to restore those who fall into sin, and to follow the example of the early church. We will be having a class soon for those who are interested in committing to The Bridge.
Today, we’re going to go down a little different route. Last week was about the structure of the church. I gave you the skeleton of the church. The skeleton is built on members committed to one another and applying Scripture together. Today, I want to put some flesh on that skeleton. Last week’s message might sound kind of “institutional.” This week’s message is going to be more “organic.” I want to show you what it looks like when we truly commit ourselves to one another. It looks like John 13:34-35. It looks like a group of disciples who love one another sacrificially, even to the point of laying down our lives for one another.
In John 13-17 we have the events that transpired the evening before Christ went to the cross. Jesus is in an upper room with His disciples, and He is giving them some very important instruction. Jesus knows that His life will be over within 24 hours. He knows that He will be arrested and taken away to crucifixion. So in the few hours He has left, He gives His disciples some of His most important teachings.
This morning we are going to focus on Christ’s words in John 13:34-35, “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.”
The Bible depicts love as the greatest mark of Christian maturity. We are called to love God, the Church, and the world. We love God through worship and obedience. We love the church by sacrificially serving one another. We love the world by proclaiming the gospel of salvation to it.
When we talk about what a church should prioritize, there are all kinds of things that compete for the top spot: sound doctrine, Biblical theology, a regenerate membership, godly leaders, and expository preaching. There have been many books written about what constitutes a healthy church, like Mark Dever’s book, “9 Marks of a Healthy Church.” However, if I were writing a book, I would definitely include “Love for the brethren” and perhaps I would put it at the very top of the list. All of those things are extremely important. However, when it comes to living out our life together as a church I’m going to make a case that love for one another deserves the top spot. Why do I make this claim? Let’s take a look at a few Scriptures.
Matthew 22:36-40 “Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?” And He said to him, “`YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND.´ “This is the great and foremost commandment. “The second is like it, `YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF.´ “On these two commandments depend the whole Law and the Prophets.” If we love God and people, we have fulfilled the Law. We don’t have to worry about all the hundreds of laws in Scripture, and whether we are obeying each one. If we simply love God and people, we will obey all of God’s commands.
Colossians 3:14, “Beyond all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity.” Paul indicates that the most important thing we should aim at in our Christian lives is love. It’s the glue of the church. It bonds us together in unity. Without love, we will fracture and fall apart. Beyond all these things – beyond compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, patience, and forgiveness. Love deserves the place of prominence above them all.
1 Peter 4:8, “Above all, keep fervent in your love for one another, because love covers a multitude of sins.” Peter tells us above all, keep fervent in your love. Over and over we read that love should top our list of priorities when it comes to practical Christian living. Is it yours?
This morning we are going to meditate on Christ’s New Commandment in John 13:34-35. As we do, I’m going to ask four questions of the text. 1) Why are we to love? 2) Who are we to love? 3) How are we to love? 4) What will happen when we love?
1. Why Are We To Love?
Jesus said, “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another.” The first thing we must see about loving one another is that it is a commandment. Jesus calls it a New Commandment. Jesus, as the Lord and Head of the Church, is giving His church a commandment. We must see this morning that we are bound by Christ’s authority, to obey Him in this regard. Some have even called this “The 11th Commandment.” They say God the Father gave the 10 Commandments, but Jesus the Son is giving us here The 11th Commandment.
It is true that this is the only time that Jesus told us He was giving us a new commandment. If this is the only new commandment that Jesus gave His church, we need to sit up and take notice, and determine that we will heed this commandment. Have I piqued your interest? I hope so!
Notice how the apostle John puts it in 1 John 3:23, “This is His commandment, that we believe in the name of His Son Jesus Christ, and love one another, just as He commanded us.” Isn’t that interesting. John speaks about a single commandment, but then He commands 2 different things – faith in Christ and love for one another. And this isn’t the only place where the entire Christian life is reduced to two marks, faith and love. Listen to how the apostle Paul puts it in Ephesians 1:15, “For this reason I too, having heard of the faith in the Lord Jesus which exists among you and your love for all the saints.” Notice how Paul puts it in 2 Thess. 1:3, “We ought always to give thanks to God for you, brethren, as is only fitting, because your faith is greatly enlarged, and the love of each one of you toward one another grows ever greater.” Again, Paul reduces Christianity to two basic activities – faith and love. The one thing you must exercise toward Christ is faith. The one thing you must have toward your brothers and sisters is love.
So, why are we to love? Because Jesus commanded us to love, plain and simple. And because love is an indispensable mark of a true Christian. Jesus said, “If you love Me you will keep My commandments.” Do you love Christ? Then you must give yourself to loving your brothers and sisters in Christ. You simply must.
2. Who Are We To Love?
Jesus said, “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.” Three different times, Jesus answers our question. Who are we to love? One another.
Let’s start by asking who Jesus was speaking to. That’s an easy one. Jesus was speaking to His eleven disciples. By this time Judas had already left the group, and the eleven disciples were with Jesus Christ. Jesus was speaking to true believers, members of His church. Jesus looked at His disciples and said, “You disciples of Mine are to love each other.” Now, this is one of the ways that this commandment is a new commandment. We have a similar commandment in the Old Testament in Leviticus 19:18. There we read, “you shall love your neighbor as yourself.” In the Old Testament, the Jews were commanded to love their neighbor. In other words, they were to love anyone who lived close to them, who they ran into, who crossed their path. We have to remember that the Jews were a mixed multitude. Some of them were true believers like Abraham, Jacob, Joseph, Moses, Samuel, and David. However, many of them were not true believers. Paul says later in Romans 9:6, “They are not all Israel who are descended from Israel.” It was only the true remnant of Israel that were saved. The majority were unbelieving and perished in sin and unbelief.
However, now Jesus says He has a new commandment for His disciples. They are to love other disciples. To put it another way, members of His church are to love other members of His church. Christians are to love other Christians. You might be thinking, “Brian, that sounds kind of narrow to me. Shouldn’t we love everyone?” Yes, there is a sense in which we should love all people. Jesus told us that we were to love our enemies and pray for those who persecute us. Yes, we are to love all mankind without exception. However, there are other passages of Scripture that teach us that we are to love the saints in a special way. That’s exactly how God loves. God loves the whole world in a general way, but He loves His church in a special way.
Paul says in Galatians 6:10, “So then, while we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, and especially to those who are of the household of the faith.” Yes, we are to do good to all people, but if we must make a decision between loving people of the world or the household of the faith we must choose the household of faith. Do you see God’s priority for our love here?
And, this is not the only place in Scripture where we are told to direct our love to the brethren. Notice these texts:
Romans 12:10, “Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor”
1 Thessalonians 3:12, “and may the Lord cause you to increase and abound in love for one another, and for all people, just as we also do for you”
1 Thessalonians 4:9, “Now as to the love of the brethren, you have no need for anyone to write to you, for you yourselves are taught by God to love one another”
Hebrews 13:1, “Let love of the brethren continue.”
1 Peter 1:22, “Since you have in obedience to the truth purified your souls for a sincere love of the brethren, fervently love one another from the heart”
1 Peter 2:17, “Honor all people, love the brotherhood, fear God, honor the king.”
1 John 3:14, “We know that we have passed out of death into life, because we love the brethren. He who does not love abides in death.”
I think we can all agree that loving other believers is a major emphasis of the teaching of the New Testament. This is an area of our Christian lives that we must not ignore or neglect. God has commanded us to love each other.
3. How Are We to Love?
Jesus said, “even as I have loved you.” Now, there is the big change between the old law to love our neighbor, and the new love to love one another. The old law said to love our neighbor as we love ourselves. The new law says we are to love one another even as Christ loved us. This new law of love goes way beyond the old law of love. But this love goes way beyond that one. To love our neighbor as much as we love ourselves, is to take half of my plate of food and give it to a neighbor who doesn’t have any food. It is to take one of my two coats and give it to my neighbor who doesn’t have any coats. Neighbor love is a love with limits. When I am in danger, this love stops. My friends, this is the lowest level of love commanded in Scripture. If we were honest, we would have to admit that we don’t even love others with this kind of love. We make great efforts to enrich ourselves, while ignoring the needs of others all around us. If we love one another as we love ourselves, it ought to be offensive. We are not neighbors that just happen to live next to each other. We are family!
But to love one another as Christ loved us, has no limits. It is to not think of myself at all. This kind of love means taking my whole plate of food and giving it to my Christian brother who has none. I am not to love my brother as I love myself, because in the Christian life, self is gone. Paul says in Galatians 2:20, “I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me.”
Now, let’s ask the question, “How did He love us?” If we are to love one another as He loved us, we must know how He loved us. Well the answer is that Christ loved us to the point of laying down His life for us. His love was selfless and sacrificial. It’s no wonder that the same John writes in 1 John 3:16, “We know love by this, that He laid down His life for us; and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren.” Think of another brother or sister in this room right now. Would you die for him or her? Would you take a bullet for him? Do you realize that this is the kind of love God is calling us to have for one another?! We have trouble even inconveniencing ourselves to help one another! We grumble and drag our feet about calling someone who is struggling, or taking food to someone who is sick. Church, this is sin! Acts of love toward one another should characterize our lives. This is a proof that we are saved, according to 1 John 3:14. How are we to love one another? We are to love each other in the same way Jesus loved us. We are to love sacrificially.
Let’s take this a little further. 1 Peter 1:22 says we are to “fervently love one another from the heart.” The word “fervent” means something that is brought to a boiling pitch. It is great intensity of spirit. It refers to that which is hot, glowing, or burning. To fervently love one another means that we love one another with a burning, intense love. This word “fervent” is used of athletes who strain every nerve to reach a goal. Not only are we to love one another sacrificially, but also fervently.
Romans 12:9, “Let love be without hypocrisy.” How are we to love? We are to live genuinely and sincerely. We are not to be fake or phony. We are not to pretend we are loving. As John puts in 1 John 3:18, “Little children, let us not love with word or with tongue, but in deed and truth.” As long as you simply talk about your love for other people, but never do anything for them, you are practicing a hypocritical love. Love must act in order to be real love. We are to love one another non-hypocritically.
So, how are we to love? Sacrificially, fervently, and non-hypocritically. Here’s one final thought on that. We must love practically. What do I mean? I mean for love to be real love, it needs to show itself in real practical ways. As John puts in 1 John 3:17-18, “But whoever has the world’s goods, and sees his brother in need and closes his heart against him, how does the love of God abide in him? Little children, let us not love with word or with tongue, but in deed and truth.” As long as you simply talk about your love for other people, but never do anything for them, you are practicing a hypocritical love. Love must act in order to be real love. So, how are we to love one another practically? I believe we are to do that by living out the one anothers of the New Testament. How do we love one another? We serve one another, forgive one another, encourage one another, admonish one another, pray for one another, bear with one another, exhort one another, and on and on it goes. This is practical New Testament church life. This is what it means to live in the body. To love others is going to require that you take time to think about others and what their needs are. Maybe they need a call. Maybe they need someone to meet with them and read Scripture and pray for them. Maybe they need some groceries. Maybe they need some help on how to be a godly Mom or Dad. Really, to love others simply means that you show your care and concern for them in practical ways.
Of course, our problem is that we turn inward and become self-absorbed. We think only of what we want to do with our time. Being a member of a local church means I need to be willing to sacrifice to show care and concern for you. When is the last time you had another family in this church over for dinner? If it has been a long time, why is that? Love one another means that we love people who are not like us. When we join a local church we find that there are other people in this church that are very different from us. Perhaps they are younger or older, or from a different nationality or culture. Maybe their background and traditions are very different from ours. Maybe, if we were truthful, we would have to say that we don’t really like them. You know what? None of that matters. What matters is that we learn to love all God’s true people, no matter how different they are from us. The only way that’s going to happen is if we start making an effort to get to know one another, and then start making a sacrificial commitment to do others good. Folks, every time we are together, look for opportunities to love someone. When you come on Sunday mornings, find out how people are doing, and pray for them right there. When you get together for lunch, listen carefully and find out where the needs are, and seek to meet those needs for Christ’s sake.
So, how should we love? Sacrificially, fervently, non-hypocritically, and practically.
4. What Will Happen When We Love?
Jesus gives us the answer to that question in verse 35, “By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.” Love is the badge of true discipleship. Love is the badge of the church. How is the world going to know who belongs to Jesus Christ? Is it our sound doctrine and Biblical theology? Is it by wearing a cross around our neck? Is it by our Christian T-shirts, and bumper stickers? Is it our ability to speak in tongues and heal the sick? Is it by carrying our big black Bibles wherever we go?
Brothers and sisters, it’s none of those things. When unbelievers show up on Sundays, or hang out with us at our fellowship lunches or Missional Communities, they ought to see something that they don’t see anywhere else in the world. They ought to see a family that loves and cares for each other. This supernatural love, produced in us by the Holy Spirit, can have a very powerful attractive force upon the world. God can use it to arrest their attention, and cause them to think and ponder whether Christianity may be true after all. We talk a lot about how we are going to reach the world with the gospel. Well, here’s one of the pieces that I don’t think we consider very often – the power of Christian love. Love each other out in the world where others can see it. Invite unbelievers into our circles where they can see this love of Christ. God may use it to grab hold of their attention and cause them to start wondering whether Jesus Christ truly is Savior and Lord.
Conclusion
Will you begin today to seek to love others here at The Bridge? It will mean investing your time, your energy, and your money. It will mean that you stop thinking only about yourself, and your needs, and what you want, and start considering how you can lay your life down for others. It will mean that you will no longer think of your church the way you think of choosing a fast food restaurant. You’ll think of your church as the place where you will selflessly love others like Christ loved His church. Friends, we all have 24 hours in a day and 7 days a week. Invest some of that time during the week in loving others. Join a Missional Community. Call or email or text others during the week to see how you can minister to them. Have others into your home for a meal and fellowship. Just do something and let God lead you. Let’s love one another so that all men will know what we are Christ’s disciples. Amen? Let’s pray.
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